WCD Knuckle Balls: Chapter To Come In The Book Of A-Rod

Alex Rodriguez is finished.  Washed up.  Kaput.  Done.  His career is more lifeless than Brian Wilson’s barber.

That’s what you think.  We here at the WCD desk think A-Rod still has something left in him.  Sure, he’s stunk up the postseason with a collective performance reminiscent of Grandad playing ‘Angry Birds’ without his glasses.  But that’s all in the past now.  It’s time to look to the future.  And it’s brighter than the shine off of Raul Ibanez’s melon as he rounds the horn on his home run heroics.

Here’s the possible next steps for our good friend, A-Rod:

Donate his leg to Derek Jeter…
There’s not much left in Alex’s bod that even Madonna would want.  He does have a left leg, though.  And he’s certainly not using it to run the bases.  Ergo, lop it off, give it to the cap’n, and pray like hell it doesn’t get rejected as non-HOF DNA.

Request a trade to the Sugarland Skeeters…
Like a good dose of Nandrolone, the Skeeters specialize in turning has-beens into has-beans.  A-Rod could be their finest reclamation project yet.

Re-invent himself as a pitcher…
A-Rod is already a strikeout machine - he just needs to take it from the dish to the mound.  And getting pre-emptive Tommy John surgery would show he was serious about his commitment to the new craft.  Actually, he could probably get a discount if he had the left leg amputation done at the same time.  

Become manager of the Boston Red Sox…
What better way to get revenge on those spoiled, ungrateful, twenty-seven titled Yankee fans than to lead the Fenway faithful out of the Valentine valley of darkness and back to a .500 record.  That’ll show ‘em.